Friday, August 6, 2010

Things I Never Thought I Would Say

Good job pooping!

Please don't lick the window, Alex.

Alex, please don't stick your cheese to the television.

We are nice to the kitty- we don't touch her butt.

Come here, let me smell your tush.

Friday, June 18, 2010

Best. Ever.

Most amazing thing evah.

This morning, I was walking with the boy, and he said, "See the flowers?"

I do. I do see the flowers!

"They nice."

Yes, they are, they're beautiful.

"They bootiful."   -- pause--  "YOU bootiful, Mommy,"

Sigh.  Melt.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Naked Boy

When I was in college, I would babysit for my nephews every time I was home for a visit. On one occasion, my nephew Aaron was just barely old enough to be able to dress and undress himself. I sent him upstairs to get into his pajamas. Not two minutes later, a butt naked 3-or4-year old came walking nonchalantly down the stairs. When he reached the bottom, he looked at me and said, "I am Naked Boy. Woo. Hoo."

I have never forgotten it... and I have never let him forget it, either. (He is now 13 and I'm sure he LOVES when I remind him of this particular night)

Last night, I was working late. When I got home, Daddy was running the bath for the Boy. I yelled out, "Hello!" to let them now I was home. Out of the bathroom, my blond haired little cherub came running, saying, "Mommy Mommy Mommy!"  He was wearing only a pair of jeans. He stopped dead in front of me, I picked him up, and he said, exuberantly, "I NAKED!"

It took me back to the moment when Aaron did almost the same thing. It took my breath away at how fast the years pass. How quickly my boy, too, will grow up.

I gave the Boy a kiss, snuggled my nose into his neck, and informed him, "Your BELLY is naked." :)

Monday, April 26, 2010

Birthday parties

It's that time of year again (already????).... that lovely, hectic, insane time in which I am planning the Boy's birthday party. I love putting together the party. I love having the right food, an adorable cake, fabulous and enlightened goody bags which cost almost nothing to put together....

I hate the invitations and thank-you notes. I spent forevah combing various discount stores for the perfect invitations, which I opened and began writing on BEFORE discovering that a different store had packages which included matching thank-you notes for very little more. Grr. Imagine my distress when I realized that while my son would have the perfect, Lightning McQueen invites, he would have to settle for generic, balloon-infested thank you notes. Which I would write, because he is, you know, two years old and all. All he would do with the notes would be to try and eat them, or "read" them to the cat.

The theme of the party was very easily chosen this year, as it was last year. Last year we were all about Sesame Street, whereas this year we have matured and moved on to the ever-popular "vehicles" theme, so chosen because the Boy can name literally every vehicle that passes us on the street. And woe to you if you do not acknowledge his naming; he will repeat it at increasing volume until you do. He's just excited; he loves the vehicles SO MUCH that he wants to share them with you.

My MIL is making the cake; as she does, she made our engagement party, bridal shower, wedding, and baby shower cakes as well as the Boy's 1st birthday party cake. I have told her to go crazy with the vehicle theme; one less thing I have to think about. Especially since the Boy (being WHOSE child???) is not especially fond of cake. Not sure where that aspect of his tastes comes from; he is just like me on the cheese front.

I think I am focusing on all this to avoid believing in the fact that MAH BAH-BEE IS TWOOOO.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Trying.... to keep blogging....

I've been trying so hard to do this blogging thing. How do you all find the time? When I get home from work, I am swept into a crazy maelstrom of dinner, errands, outside time (thank god the winter seems to be over), bath, bedtime, and an attempt at restoring my own sanity by reading YOUR blogs. Having an almost-two-year-old tornado who is learning words, letters, and numbers almost faster than I can teach them, who never sits still, who is always exploring and curious to explore even more, makes it almost impossible to sit and write about my own life. But I'm still trying!

Things are GOOD. The long, dreary, cold winter seems to be over (although in New York, we never lose sight of the fact that it can still snow even in April or May), and we are gearing up with sidewalk chalk, bubbles, and plastic lawn mower, wheelbarrow, and dump truck for a spring and summer full of outside time. I'm feeling optimistic- my husband just got a new job, making a bit more money- enough so we don't have to fret at the end of pay periods, float a rent check, worry so much in general. We're getting to a point where I can see an actual house in our future- sure, it's years away, but it's there, a glimmering possibility on the far horizon. We just signed our apartment lease for another year- it's small, but we love it, and we can make it work- at least until we add to our family in a year or two. Our lives are full of playdates and fun, friends and happiness. Keeping my fingers crossed that it stays that way!

Thursday, March 4, 2010


The Boy is learning about what animals say. He's quite good at this, and has many animals and their accompanying noises, all present and accounted for.

Last night we successfully taught him that the walrus says, "goo goo ga joob."

I think we rock.

Friday, February 26, 2010

Recent Boy Meltdowns

Meltdown #1: In shoe store. Tried a pair of sandals on the Boy (in FEBRUARY, yes, we are wild and crazy). They were far too small, because somehow my child has gone from wearing a 5 to a 6.5 WIDE no less, and it being the middle of winter and all, they didn't have any in his freakishly large size. So we put them back. And he ssccccreeeeeeeeeeeamed. He wanted the SOOS, the SOOS! SOOS PEAS! And it didn't matter that we were getting him two fabulous and very manly pairs of toddler sneakers. He wanted the SOOS! I found myself repeatedly reassuring my boy child that we would indeed, come back for the sandals as soon as they had him in his size.

Meltdown #2: In our bathroom. There exists in our home a small stepstool from my childhood (so yeah, 30+ years old or whatever). It has a picture of some odd bearish creature riding, for some reason, in a train. On the stool is written, "Step up, I'm a stair, or sit down, I'm a chair." The Boy in his wisdom figured out that if this stool was placed in front of the bathroom sink, he could REACH the WATER and even hold his toothbrush IN the water oh my hell. So then it was bathtime, and we had the audacity to remove him from the stool to put him in the bath. A meltdown such as the bathroom has never seen. I basically threw some soap on him, splashed him with water, and hauled him out because GOOD LORD THE SCREAMING.

Not a meltdown, but funny all the same: Daily, in our house. The Boy sometimes needs to be given water in every single cup he owns, all at the same time. Then he drinks from them, one after the other.

This is definitely MY child.

Thursday, February 25, 2010


So my nephew is sick. A few months ago, doctors discovered that his intestines, rather than being all nice and neat or however intestines are supposed to be, were uh...NOT. Yeah, I don't have any fancy doctor words here.
My nephew is 15 and has had a history of digestive issues. Seriously? It took 15 years to discover this?
He had surgery about two weeks ago, recovered, and went home. And then he started throwing up. Repeatedly. He had to go back to the hospital, where we were told it was "most likely" a blockage where his stomach meets his small intestine, and that they "hoped" it would clear up on its own. If not, more surgery. He's sedated and being fed through tubes and lines, with another tube emptying his stomach so the poor kid stops constantly vomiting.

I wish I could help.

The relationship between my sister and I (this nephew's mother) has never been good. She was the youngest for 8 years until I came along, and I think our relationship was pretty much sunk before I was born. We had to share a room. She never really fit in with my other sister and I, who despite being 11 years apart, were alike to the point where people couldn't tell us apart on the phone and our laughs were and are scarily identical. The sister of whom I speak did not attend my wedding. Or my baby shower. And did not meet her own nephew until he was three months old, and that was only because we happened to be at my parents' cabin on the same weekend that summer. We never got along. We never really tried (well, I did, especially once my son was born, but there are only so many times you can have a door slammed in your face).

As a consequence, I don't know my nephew and niece as well as I would like to. I wish I could be there to help. But I wouldn't be welcomed. And that just sucks.

Monday, February 15, 2010


Because I never want to forget......

Tank oo : thank you
Wack-come: welcome
Guck: truck
Masa guck: monster truck
Bump guck: dump truck
Tootle: turtle
Mutmag: Nutmeg (our cat)
Side: outside
Chiz: cheese
Cheep: chip
Masickle: motorcycle

Friday, February 12, 2010

Bliss Week

This week, the Dude's sitter has been on vacation. What was first a nightmare of logistics has turned into an amazing, wonderful week, leaving me wishing that things could be like this more often.

Daddy was home with the Boy Tuesday and today. On Tuesday, they went to the children's museum and made a card for me (dying of the cuteness). Yesterday, my mother-in-law's sig other took on the Boy for a day. I'm sure he left our home needing a nap- but our Boy could not stop raving about "Say-um. Say-um" (Sam). There were Matchbox cars everywhere and half a bag of cheese balls had been consumed. I'd say it was a good day. But Wednesday- Wednesday! That was MY day home with my guy. And it was amazing. We went to the library- tried out storytime, but at 20 months, he is just too young to sit still. Actually, I don't know if this kid will ever sit still before kidnergarten. Unless of course, Cars or monster trucks are on the tv. So we colored a picture for Daddy, played in the children's room, and had a discussion about the "shishies" (fishies).

There were cuddles. There were kisses. There was much chasing of the Boy. There was sharing of sheese (cheese). There was playing with cars. There was stroking his soft, blond hair and inhaling that baby scent of the top of his head. That scent which is much less present these days. I sniff and sniff the top of his head, as if I can save it up for future reference when the scent is no longer there. My husband thinks I'm crazy- but I'm convinced this is a scent that only mommies can smell.

It made me wish so hard that I didn't have to work. That I could stay home with my Boy and have days like that every day. I know it's good for him to have his day care- it's a small, family home day care with only a few other kids, most of whom are all around his age. He is happy there and calls the other kids his buddies. He has fun, and is learning. We need my income in our home. I know that I can't be a stay-at-home mom, and that there isn't anything wrong with that. But it doesn't stop me from wishing.

Wednesday, February 3, 2010


We have been sick.

Seriously, it was never-ending there for a while. First I got some minor stomach bug, which was followed a week later by a more serious one. That one had the good sense to manifest itself at work, forcing me to barf in my work bathroom. I was horrified. Fortunately, I was working late duty (10:30am-7pm) and it was 6pm, so there weren't many people around to witness or hear my humiliation! Unfortunately, we had had a "food day". Throwing up buffalo chicken dip = no fun. Later that night my husband had the joy of seeing me throw up in a garbage can. It's a good thing we're already married, or he might have run screaming into the night. Then, of course, the Boy got it in the middle of the night. Poor little man, he's only 19 months old, had no idea what was happening to him, and threw up twice in his crib. A musical elephant met its demise, but other than that everything came clean. Even though he had had grape tomatoes for dinner. He segued from that into bronchitis, so there has been an extreme over-viewing of Cars and Mickey Mouse Clubhouse at our house.

Hot dog, hot dog, hot diggety dog, we've got ears, it's time for cheers......

Fortunately, the lovely lovely Zithromax seems to have destroyed the evil bronchitis, and the Boy is better today, although still tired and cranky. He toddled on off to his friends when I dropped him off at day care this morning.

In other news, my husband and I might be insane. We love our current apartment; we love the area; we are happy there and we can afford it. We didn't intend to move until we have another little one on the way or in the house (which, god willing, won't be for another couple years). However, me being me, I'm always on the lookout for a 3-bedroom we can afford. I found one today; however it's about half an hour away from where we currently live. The downside would be that we would have to move in general (HATE) and would be moving away from an area we love. The upside would be that we were in a 3-bedroom we could afford, and would be living closer to two families we love and often have playdates with. I think our general consensus is that we still don't plan to move; however if the place is awesome we might end up taking it. We're going to look at it tonight; we shall see what happens.

Monday, January 4, 2010


I love Craigslist, consignment sales, and garage sales. I will take any and all hand-me-downs. I have ALMOST no limits. I get way too much enjoyment from procuring three grocery bags full of clothing for my son for $5, only to open them up and find that they include TWO denim jackets, a pair of shoes in his size from Gymboree, a fireman jacket, and clothing from places such as the Gap, Calvin Klein, and LL Bean. But I do have my limits.

I will buy, hide away, and strategically bring out over 100 Matchbox cars (for $10) no matter how beat up they look (as long as they aren't broken!). I will buy a lot of toys even if I don't want all of them- and then bring them home and turn around and sell the ones I don't want.... last time I wound up with $200 worth for $10, only to end up making $50 off the ones I didn't want.

There is a lot of Clorox Anywhere spray usage in my house. But I do have limits. And what are my limits (my husband asks repeatedly)? Here they are:

Things I will not buy used:
Anything that goes in the mouth (utensils, bottles, binkies, teethers... that people try to sell these items used drives me crazy)

Um... yeah. That's pretty much it. :) Anything else can be cleaned with Anywhere Spray, bleach, and good old fashioned hot water.